I've long been intrigued by the fantasy of teaming up with another guy to sam'ich a girl, ever since a girlfriend told me that she often fantasized about two men when she masturbated -- lying on her stomach, one hand fondling her clit while reaching around with the other to massage her anus. Hearing her detail this fantasy used to send me into tremors of excitement. To fulfill her, I would penetrate and finger her both ways. But bringing in another guy was something neither of us wanted to do. Why? We were in love. And we agreed that bringing in someone else was complicated and would potentially taint the relationship with jealousy. So while sharing a girlfriend is out of the question for me (sorry if you don't like hearing this perspective), i remain open to a trifecta with a non-romantically involved lover.

I imagine it would drive any girl wild to have two mouths on her, one at each pair of lips; hands in her hair, hands caressing her all over; two cocks in turn or in tandem; two men overwhelming her, overloading her with stimulus. I'll address the discomfort I'd feel being naked and performing alongside another guy: hell yes that would be uncomfortable! At first. But my focus would be on the girl. And if there were some preliminary nekkidness (i.e. let's take off our clothes, have a bottle of wine and fondle this gorgeous young woman) i suspect that self-conscious period would pass. And i wouldn't be surprised if two guys in this situation wouldn't find occasion to congratulate one another like, "Hey, nice job hitting her G-spot." Then again, if a girl wants two guys who would be more interactive, there are some switch hitters out there. I think if a girl is honest about what she wants and communicates it directly, she can put together any fantasy she wants. It's probably more awkward for guys to find two consenting girls for a three-way.

To all the boys out there who think, NO WAY to the sam'ich...open your minds. I have enjoyed a sexually adventurous life and have had the pleasure of sharing a girl with another guy and let me tell you it was a great night. Yes, it does involve you being comfortable with yourself...but isn't that what we are all striving for. I spent a night out partying with friends, and had the fortune of ending the night with a good guy friend and a good girl friend...having had a history with the girl, we sunk into our old tricks and the girl was more than happy to have another player in the mix. Watching her get more and more steamed up about having not one but two boys to play with just made the situation hotter. She loved having one of us up by her mouth and another of us down below...and moving all round with the flow. She got more hot with each minute and said and did things even she thought she would never do...to the point it ended with the two of us bathing her in our explosion and her smiling the entire time. The three of us still talk about it and she still says it was one of her best nights ever. So guys...trust me, its a very sexual and fantastic way to spend an evening...let your minds go and your body will follow...

Anonymous

I think you're right that most men fantasize about FFM rather than FMM, and you're also right that to a certain extent, it has to do with control. Whether or not most men who entertain (and then reject) the notion of the FMM threesome admit it or not, I think it also has quite a lot to do with mainstream male heterosexual hangups and the uptight straight guy feeling very uncomfortable in the presence of another man in a sexual situation. Why? Because it raises all sorts of semi-homophobic issues: what if I touch his penis, what if our bodies, our hands, our mouths (heaven forbid) come into contact. What if it happens and I LIKE IT?! Yikes! To a lesser extent, what if I can't perform like the other guy or don't "measure up" to the other guy? I think in these scenarios, the woman gets lost in the uncomfortableness equation, but I think semi-subconsciously this is a very real issue for men who might find themselves faced with such an "opportunity".

I think the typical porn "two dudes gangbang the girl" scenario is fantasy - the two real men who find themselves in this situation are not going to be high-fiving one another and laughing as they simultaneously come on her face. In reality, there's going to be a little sweat, nervous anticipation, and peformance anxiety involved. Bottom line is *chemistry*: It's hard enough to find a one-on-one situation where the partners can communicate properly and be at ease with each other enough to really make it rock for both of them. When you try to add a third party to the mix, especially in a FMM combination, your odds of finding a threesome that "clicks", with no hangups, is very small. That's not to say it's not worth the effort. Truth be told, it's something I haven't experienced (yet), but with the right partners, it'll be well worth the initial jitters. Am I up for this? Down for this? Absolutely, when the chemistry's right.

As both a comment 'virgin' and a man I submit my thoughts with some trepidation, but your item on the sam'ich made me think about my own experiences of this and the 'fears' that you correctly identify in many men. I have greatly enjoyed threesomes involving a second man but recognise many of the issues you identified in your piece. To see, feel, hear and sense your partner brought to a state of shear extasy in this way is a truly wonderful experiencebut please dont overlook the conditioning that us unfortunate men need to overcome to really enjoy this. Maintaining physical and/or eye contact is very important, as is not getting hung up about the inevitable physical contact with the other man. Passing though periods of watching, being watched and both kissing, licking, sucking, carressing and fucking at the same time is a wonerful turn on, and the more my partner gets turned on, the more I want to do.

Competition? Yeh of a sort, but not in a macho way. Some times a mans own orgasm can get in the way really feeling a womans orgasm and I like to feel both!. In terms of appetite it seesm to me that a sexually confident women can nearly always outlast a man, but two men makes for a really long and intense session, the buzz from which lasts for much longer and will bring you back to being turned on for days after. Yep guys, if you havnt done it you dont know what you are missing. Three golden rules though - 1. make sure you are cool with the physical contact with another man, in my experience some superficial guy-guy contact can be a turn-on for your woman. 2. Ensure that respect is maintained throughout - multiple bloke/one woman sex can bring out the worst in some men 3. Above all let your woman lead, trust her to make the running and it will be better for everyone. Go for it!

I haven't...Oh, but I would...And I hope that one day I will. To orbit around a woman who is confident enough about what she wants that she'll choreograph two men for her pleasure; to figure in such unambiguously sexual action - what could be better? And, damn, the thought of it just heats the blood!

Have I? Yes. Would I do it again? Yes. There are two parts to this account. One is my thoughts on the dynamics of "sam'iches" and the other is a hot personal anecdote. I have participated in threesomes like this only under situations where the other gent and I totally focus on the woman. I've found out there are many issues and variations that surround this kind of sexual exchange. Here are some basics from what I've learned from experience and from discussion with others:

1.) The two men must know at the outset if this is a scene where the woman wants all the attention or wants her gents to play together too while she assists. The woman must be verbally clear on this as well to prevent misunderstandings from ruining the evening.

2.) There are three ways to make a sam'ich. If the woman's involved in a relationship with one of the men, if no one is involved, and if the two men are involved. I have experience with only the first two, so I'll go from there. If you are the free agent and the woman and other guy are a couple, no matter how open-minded he says he is, you have to make sure the other guy is alpha male throughout the exchange while you provide pleasure support (sorta like fire support. Men like it when you put things into military metaphors.) It's a really good idea to discuss before hand what both she and he feel comfortable with you doing to her. Once that's established, I've found it's appreciated to softly ask permission as you move through different acts. Especially if it's the first time for the three of you. People have been known to change their minds.

3.) If the woman wants all the attention, she's setting up a situation where she's the "bottom" (receiving all the lovin') and the two men are the "tops" (administers of the lovin'. Unless of course she wants to reach down to say hello her sweet little clit during the action, but I digress....) Again, I've had my best scenes where the gent and I can meet in the locker room, man-to-man, before game time and discuss some relevant plays (we like football metaphors too.) This sportfuck is a team game. No cowboys or heroes need apply. The better the gents can function as one, (like an east-Indian god with two cocks, two tongues and two sets of hands) the better her experience will be. That takes pre-game consulting and subtle in-the-field communication that distracts her as little as possible and the willingness to seamlessly trade back and forth between different pleasure-makin' roles. WTF does that mean? A lot of things. But in general, it's who gets to be inside her focused 100% on the slo'pump while the other concentrates his complete attention on his clitoral massage routine (assuming she doesn't want to control that herself, which is all good.)

So why do I enjoy this? When it's a good scene, it affords you the unfortunately rare privilege to witness a woman in the throws of some of the most profound pleasure possible for her to feel. The gratitude she'll have for the two of you is immeasurable. And in the end, you were a part of what it takes to manifest true earthly ecstasy from fantasy into reality. (If you get a hard-on for that sort of metaphysical thing that is.)

It's hot anecdote time! One time the couple I was with wanted both me and her boyfriend to slo'pump her gorgeous ass, but his cock was huge and it was always too painful for anal sex to work for them. So I said, "Lemmie go first. Then I promise 'Dan' will be able to rock your world by the time I'm through with you." (Incidentally, "Dan" and I had already worked it out in the pre-game that it would be a great idea for me to go in first to pave the way for his uber-package. He let me go first!! Quite a privilege huh?! A testament to Dan's priority for his girlfriend's pleasure. But his generosity turned out to be a little more than met the eye.) My cock was just right for her. Not too big, not too small. I sweetly screwed her round, well-lubed bottom while she was on her knees rubbing her very-hard clit with one hand and her head on a pillow in Dan's lap. Dan joined in on his honey with some whispered hot talk and a nice, baby powder backrub.

I remember his most surprising line: "Do you know how much I've wanted to watch your perfect ass get owned right in front of me?" She heard that and came HARD and by the time I came just as hard, her ass was open and hungry. Dan rolled on the condom and we switched positions. He lubed up his shaft and I'll never forget the long, deep groan "Tammy" made as I watched his monster-cock slide effortlessly into her apple ass on the first stroke all the way down to the hilt. Needless to say, Dan was speechless in that moment and after he snapped out of it her world was soundly rocked while I watched and pushed my palms up and down her slender back in a gentle rhythm. Her second and third orgasms were even more powerful. Now I'm sure some of you in the audience are thinking the following: "Well that proves that big dicks rule the land and this long-winded fool is second banana to Dan! How could he put himself into such a humiliatin' sitchiayshun??" Ah, grasshoppah.

Before that night it was impossible for her to enjoy anal with her boyfriend. So in that case, not having the greatest girth saved the day. And you know what else? Dan let me go first but retained his status of alpha male in the end because the size of his dick (and the size of his hands gripping her ass) upped the ante and helped make her subsequent orgasms even bigger. The moral of the story? Finding two men who want to give playing like this a try is one thing. Finding Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid is quite another! So who am I? You can find me in my boss Betty Dodson's new book, "Orgasms For Two." Drop us a line at www.bettydodson.com.

We've had a few threesomes, but not with another guy yet. We were watching a porno where 2 guys were fucking a woman in both holes simultaneously. My wife confessed that she thought about it a few times when masturbating. That turned me on so much, I nearly came! I told her I'd would go for it if that was her fantasy, but we don't know how to go about getting it. Sure we can higher an escort, but that's a little dicey. I could ask a friend, but that get's complicated right? We fantasize about a few couples we know. We masturbate ourselves while we tell each other the details of the event. I'm fucking her from behind while she is sucking his dick. I come over and put my dick in her mouth and she takes turns sucking us. He goes behind her and starts fucking her. His wife is just watching and rubbing her clit. I ask my wife if she would like to try it in both holes and she agrees. I tell her to ride his dick as I lube her asshole and gently slide it in. My wife always cums when I tell her this!!! I love it that she gets wild and loses her inhibitions. I love to please my woman any way possible. We also like to imagine that I'm fingering her while getting a lapdance from a male Cake dancer. She pulls his dick out and sucks him well. I tell him to turn around so that she can lick his balls and finger his asshole. I take my fingers out of her pussy and let him smell the essence of a woman. Her scent makes him cum in her mouth. If it is in my means to give it to her; whatever she wants, she gets. I love and worship her.

Where do I sign up?! I simply have no understanding of or patience for men who wouldn't jump at the chance to overwhelm a woman with pleasure -- whether with another man or another woman, if that's what she wants. It's funny, because the typical threesome in porn is MFM, not FMF, probably because porn producers feel that men want to watch women who are sexually ravenous and hungry for more than one male appendage. And men seem to enjoy watching such scenes, despite the fact that most of these sissies would recoil at the thought of being naked, having sex, with another man present. This is a simple case of homophobic prejudice getting in the way of healthy, adventurous sex. Men need to get over it, and if they find themselves worrying about the homoerotic implications, simply think of the experience as an opportunity to pleasure a woman to her limits -- one of the beauties of sex, after all. Those who aren't neanderthals might also take the opportunity to examine why they're fine with female same-sex possibilities but disgusted by the thought of being sexual with another man present. There's simply no defense for that sort of hypocrisy.

As for me, one of the best sexual experiences of my life involved a MFM threesome, and the woman still talks about the experience as something she'll never forget. I know, I'm still married to her, ten years later. And we're always on the look-out for the right guy -- sexy, smart and sensitive -- to recreate the experience. They are, alas, few and far between.

As a heterosexual male, I am curious of my own desire for such a situation. Rightly so you discussed the issues of insecurity - from sharing a partner to the homosexual labeling issues that a man might feel; the hardest taboo for a hetrosexual male to relate to. I have never experienced such a situation and have found it hard to even instigate such a concept with women and men without having the usual barrage of cliches, and the standard accusations from both sexes at one another. For me an ideal situation would be a scenario with strangers. People that we do not have to expose our obvious inhibitions or insecurities to the next day. This in some ways shows how our desires do not necessarily sit comfortably in our day to day lives. i.e. our society has taught us basic concepts of right and wrong which unknowingly we try to classify our desires by. And that is the notion of guilt or doing something wrong but it feels good.

Secondly my understanding (and tell me if i'm wrong) of men and women in relation to voyeursim are slightly different. Poronography is enjoyed by both sexes but in a different form for each. As a man, once I have dealt with the issues of guilt ( what would people think ?? ;-) I would and suspect many men would if they came to terms with the insecurities involved, would enjoy it. Deep down every man reacts to the visual stimulation in the privacy of their own home (with or without a partner). So therefore I ask if every man could have sex with a women and as well experience the perspevtive of voyeur at the same time, would that not be the complete sexual staisfaction for a man?

It's great fun but you have to be comfortable with the other guy, even though you're both staight. Men are so turned on visually, I wonder why more haven't, or won't enjoy a mfm threesome.

Definitely, but it would either have to be very casual sex. I'm not sure if I could get comfortable with sharing my girlfriend. While I would probably have some boundaries as far as the other man, there is something very erotic about it. I like the idea of giving a woman more attention than one man could, and there's something attractively naughty about two men and one woman.

Counter to the cliche of how men drool over the chance to do it with two women, I prefer the m-f-m alternative. I've had a couple of occasions to try it. Of course, with the right omnisexual approach, any three people can do each other very nicely. But two men on one woman has much better potential than one man trying to please two women. Watching a couple fucking, at close range (as part of the encounter I had) is an intense experience. I'm straight, but found myself really turned on by the novelty of touching another man sexually. (One fantasy, so far unfulfilled, is to tongue-kiss a woman, over and around her boyfriend's penis, until we watch it erupt in our faces.)

In the early days of the Web, I answered an ad placed by a man who was looking for another guy, to get together with him and his girlfriend. He arranged for her to screen me by phone. That went well, and we met at a bar, had a drink, and decided we were comfortable enough to move to my apartment. There, I poured more drinks, and he suggested I start to make out with her. She and I sat on the couch and fell right in to kissing, and when I looked up I saw his pants down, and him stroking his erect cock. We slid to the floor, where she told me her fantasy was to see him give another guy a blowjob. So I bent my knees and spread them apart, thrust my crotch at his face, and went into his mouth as he slurped me. After a little of that, I pulled out. I was pretty turned on, and could have come right there, but didn't want to yet. I reciprocated him for a bit, and then they were ready for me to fuck her. He handed me a condom, and she lay on the floor, facing up. I got down on top of her, and into her, and we started a rhythm. He crouched by our heads to watch, aimed his hard-on at us and started pumping. When his clear-white cream started streaming and dribbling onto her face, I lost my fight to hold myself back, and spurted inside her. (Being watched while having sex, and especially during orgasm, is a huge turn-on for me.)

She and I de-coupled. He was hard again (or still?), and mounted her from behind, on his knees. I had nice access to the point of entry, and played with both of them, rubbing her near her clit while cupping and tickling his balls. Eventually, he pulled out and turned her over to me, to finish her off. We all lay on the floor. For about twenty minutes, they made out with each other, while I smooched her clit. In between their slurps, she would whimper to him a narrative of what I was doing below. She was "on the verge" for what seemed like forever, and then her whimpers became screams as I continued to lick and suck while wriggling my index finger into her asshole.

After she came, we all sort of pulled ourselves back together, made friendly chit-chat for a few minutes, and said goodnight. I’ve had other encounters with m-f's and m-m-f's (and all sorts of multiples), but this is the one that gets me the hottest to think about. I'm not sure why Cake members find it so hard to convince men to try this combination. Some men might be anxious about sexual interaction with another man. But for me, having a woman present made me feel more confident about enjoying the chance to explore unusual sensations, like the feel of touching someone else's erect penis and balls, and the sight of his ejaculation. It also relieved some of the pressure to perform I would normally feel, giving me more of a chance to enjoy her excitement. So if this is the Cake Sam'ich, I can only encourage it. Thanks for this new section of the site!

No. I haven't. I'm 16 years married to, excuse the phrasing, an absolute babe. We've fairly recently become involved in a more "extrovert" friendship with long term friends and have had same room sex But with no actual penetrative swap - yet and perhaps never. This is not due to my concerns but the girls concerns (and, perhaps, the other male in the 4-some). I, personally would be more than happy to act out my wife's fantasy (she does subscribe to this site and has shown me this) of having 2 or more guys. So would I?.....Yes. Concerns: Yes. All the usual ones...Is he better? Is he bigger? Better built overall? Does she secretly wish to have him one on one MORE than me? etc. The dangers of not knowing the full details of potential partners is of greatest concern of course. However, that said, I trust her 100% in that I'm the one she will always love and need and want. I'd like to think she'd offer the same to me but doubt this possibility. After all she is all that I want in my life in terms of love and lasting affection...she's my wife and I love her! We are both very sexual however and I want (and she fantasises) about sharing that sexuality more. Will I? Yes, If she makes up her mind and really wants it. Presently it alternates between "Yes I do want it" when sexually stimulated and a few drinks to "No let's just keep it as a fantasy" in the 'cold light of day'.

This is interesting. This is simply a matter of consensus. If a girlfriend who was interested in a threesome asked me I'd be there, no questions asked. Of course, I require healthy partners, free of STDs is the only practicable arrangement. It is exciting in thought, yet there will be a hierarchy established between the two males, one is gonna be the alpha. Even if the woman is the boss, the two males will establish a hierarchy between the two of them, one will be subsumed to the other. Threesomes may work-out on a temporary basis. However, eventually favorites will develop, personalities will contrast, and/or join, and one of the males will eventually get pushed out, unless he does a really good sales-act, then they may let him stay around as a friend-on-hand-toyboy.

I definitely support the "Cake Sam'ich" all the way!! By your standards I am proud to consider myself a cake boy and if a girl wants to have more cake by insisting on living the 3-way fantasty for her own reasons than you go girl 'cause I'll be there with you from small talk to concerted climax! I encourage more women to follow her lead if not to indulge the boyfriend than to strengthen the relationship and empower herself with more overall confidence knowing that this is something that not only do I want but she really wants for her own reasons to. Couples that go after what they want sexually I find that they seem to have the strongest and most confident relationships later in life. The Cake Sam'ich is a great read & inspiring. Cheers, Butch

Anonymous

I have to agree with the thought of sharing a woman, any woman, with another man. Governed by the sense of threat to life, liberty and the nakedness of what we take to be "our" woman, I would fear the possibility of loss, the fear of physical, stylistic or even emotional comparison with the other guy in bed. Perhaps I am a common slob who is ruled by his insecurities, but there it is.

I can and will and would -- most resolutely (although, I must admit that little resolve is required). Les scénes-de-booty are truly about excitement. Sexual charge in the air comes in equal parts from anticipation, palpitation and, well, fornication. everyone should know that for most people, the sexiest part of the ride is taking your partner to the right stretch of highway. Turning somebody on is a turn on, and anyone that has been revved by watching their babe play the oboe solo will understand that sometimes you don't have to be play the most active part for things to be great. Am I afraid/bothered when my baby uses a vibrator? Hell no! I'll even take part! Naturally, a man is not a vibrator. (So simple, yet so true.) But the priciple is the same. If I could vibrate at three seperate speeds, I most certainly would; if I had four hands touching, two mouths for kissing and two asses for clutching, I would look very odd indeed, but I would love it, and I imagine she would too. The unasked question is this: how many ladies want the boys in this sandwich to only focus (accidental feet notwithstanding) on the fille de joi? would you be put off if the boys were dividing their time up 50-50? or is that a different kind of Sam'ich? And how do I find out beforehand so as not to make the mistake that ruins the sandwich for all?

Anonymous

I've always been willing to try this, but haven't found too many women who want it (or other willing guys). I used to fuck a ex-girlfriend while she had a dildo in her butt and the feeling was amazing for both of us. I always wondered what it would be like with a thrusting, throbbing cock in there instead.

Anonymous

I never thought about it very much until a married ex-girlfriend of mine called me a few years ago and said she and her husband were looking for an extra person to share a threesome with. Though it never happened with that couple, I was very intrigued with the idea and have been ever since. It's so much fun to be with a woman who loves the pleasures of sex. What could be better than to be part of a woman's fantasy, especially if it's all done in good fun. I've thought it would be terrific to feel my partner being so free like that, or to help someone else's partner in the same way.

My Woman-friend and I attended your last dance in NYC and had a blast. We have occasionally dabled in out of the box sexual experimentation as long as we are both there participating. I know how much I and other men love the fantasy (or reality) of being with two women at once especially if they play together as well. So, women might also like to experiment with two men at the same time? A woman can sexually touch another woman without coming out as a Lesbian. So, God forbid if two men are making love to a woman, they might come into physical contact with each other! I think I am secure enough in my masculinity to handle that.

Anonymous

Like competitive salaries, who should stay home and watch the kids and faking orgasims, I think this is just one more of the many double standards woman have to deal with. Now that I have stated the obvious...what do I think and what would I be willing to engage in.....? Like many men I have a bit of a homosexual fear (despite the redneck/ignorant air that fear gives off) but I might relent given the right circumstances. Those circumstances would include an altered state of some kind, participation w/ a man that not only did I not know but would be unlikely to meet again. And finally, a woman so totally hot and intense that none of the above really mattered. Her persuasive skills would be such that I would & could check my fears and insecurity at the door and join her and her friend on the bed.

Anonymous

Hi...yes I have, yes I would again, and yes I hope to again... I was fortunate to have a girlfriend that was secure enough in our relationship to allow me/us our fantasy...As our relationship progressed we became more willing to openly share our sexual desires and fantasies. My fantasy was to be w. my gf and another guy.. after an afternoon of golf, the three of us went to a local motel and spent a great evening of touching, kissing, making love in various positions..it lasted for hours....For me, it was an eye opener to watch a woman enjoy sex as much as she did...At first I thought I would be jealous.. but surprisingly, I was not...I thought I would be nervous seeing another man(who was more endowed than I) take my girlfriend and have her go down on him... but she enjoyed it thouroughy, as did I. I look forward to the next time...the other issue is finding the 3rd that we are both comfortable with and willing to approach..

Personally, I have been with a girl and another guy on several different occassions, and it is awesome! It's a lot of fun and in no way makes the guys involved homosexual! I loved it each time and would do it again! Watching the girl get off so hard is amazing and insane!

Anonymous

Clearly I must be unusual because I've been part of a Sam'ich three times but have never just had me and two women. No complaints however. I don't think I have any of the hangups you've ascribed to men and have enjoyed it every time. There are rules that need to strictly observed however. 1) The woman does the inviting. Hey it doesn't have to be formal; actions speak louder than words. 2) The men have got to confident in themselves, not take life or themselves too seriously AND have a sense of humour. 3) Take it slowly. No I mean take it really slowly. If you don't you arouse certain latent competitive instincts in men and they start to think it's a race to beat each other to the goal line. A little bit at a time; both concentrating on the woman; one concentrating on the woman whilst she toys with the other. Endless permutations are all part of the fun. The object is to keep the woman as aroused as possible for as long as possible; exhaustion and orgasm overdoses permitting. If you do it right there isn't anything better.

I have always been amazed by the enormous capacity of a woman to experience pleasure. Add the capacity for endless orgasms and it is little wonder that a woman would fantasize about a cakesamich and active seek to make it a reality. While this may present problems for many men, I can assure you that there are a substantial amount of us that would be privileged to be a layer in a samich. Watching a pussy build to repeated orgasms is observing a force of nature.

Dear Cake, Well having been down this road several times I can only say that it is certainly empowering for the woman involved. However, I agree with your sentiments that a guy must be very confident in his own prowess and physicality before entertaining this type of scenario. (SHIT he's bigger than me!!) I am not and have never considered myself gay but have had several threesomes and moresomes with individual girls, occasionally with other girls involved, occasionally with other guys...and women's attitudes in my lifetime have certainly changed. I'm 34, happily married (11 years) and still having the time of my life with my partner.

My wife has (during our marriage) has experienced sex with a woman, a long held fantasy of hers and two guys at once, the discussion point here...the instances were unplanned, erotic, charged and probably unrepeatable. The chemistry between three people is even more complex than two so opportunities like this are rare to say the least. We do not "swing" and detest the very connotation of the word..we do however consider ourselves "fluid" in our sexuality though..with a large distinction between "sex" and "love"....and few people know the secret of our solid relationship in this age of wrist wringing over the demise of the relationship and the rise of the single desperado.

Funny coincidence, my girlfriend and I had a threesome last night, with her former boyfriend. It's the third time in two years that we three have had the MFM sam'ich and my only experience of threesomes. Many of the 'usual' negative relationship issues come into play - competition, appearance, power, control, confidence, appearance...but not enough to spoil the fun. The 'gay' tag doesn't concern me. We haven't engaged in any direct male to male touching though you can't avoid the occassional 'light brush' as positions change. It is an intense sexual experience, especially for my girlfriend; no surprise there! Sex between just me and my girlfriend is my preference but curiosity can lead to experimentation. Oh, and in my 'typical' male fantasy hetero way, I remain curious and hopeful about a FMF sam'ich.

This has always been a girls call. I'm down for this CAKE.girl fantasy. In joining for a Sam'ich I'd be cautiously optimistic. I would require the other CAKE.boy to accept me, as I will accept him. The key is for a relationship to exist between the CAKE.boys which elicits cooperation with the CAKE.girl. STD free partners is a necessity. A preliminary activity might be a good idea--such as an private CFNM patio party in the afternoon, followed by a DVD movie in the evening, good music, etc. to bring out the sensuality, and camaraderie for the evening.

I have had quite a few threesoms. All but one have been what men feel are the way to do it, two women and one man. I feel quite differently. I loved the two man one woman threesom. I was delighted to see the action continue once I had cum, and was quickly stimulated by the events, and was able to rise again to the occasion quicker than ever. I am a far way from gay, but I was totally turned on by the sight of the other man's penis going into the woman. I found myself putting my hand onto his dick as it slid into and out. It hightenned his pleasure, and thrilled me no end. I was surprized by it, but it excited all of us so much that it turned the pleasure up higher. I realised that sex is better when the level of excitement is highest, no matter who is doing what to whom. I hunger for a repeat, but as you have said, it is hard to find a man willing to share. Perhaps it is homophobia, or posessiveness, but I would welcome a man into my bed to share my gal in a minute, if he would offer the same with his!..

My partner says this is a big fantasy of hers and I would love for it to happen. I have had some bi experiences so touching the other guy is not an issue for me. However, she seems nervous about seeing "someone she cares about" (me) with another guy. She knows of my experience but it seems that part of her fantasy includes that the guys are anonymous. I would certainly hate if fulfilling this fantasy would adversely affect the rest of our sex life together.

Anonymous

My brother and I have had several evenings of sharing a woman and I have to say it has been a wonderful successful experience. We are both perfectly normal people, working in London and we often go out for a drink in the evenings and share a hotel room to avoid the hassle and danger of late night travel. One or other of us strikes up a conversation with a good looking female, usually in a sports bar or club, and when the response is 'oh, I like your brother,' then it is just a matter of gentle persuasion. The fact we are brothers removes the element of male territory; after all we shared train sets 30 years ago! Women seem to get a big turn on from the brother thing; perhaps memories of fantasies about their big brother?

I am a straight guy and have had several CAKE Sam'ich's, all of which that I can recall were enjoyable. I am happy to please, and see no reason a girl should not experience that to her heart's content. Of course, the engineering can be a challenge, since the guys are trying not to touch one another, though I was involved in one where my girlfriend wanted both of us in her pussy at the same time. We tried, but I think the thought to both of us guys was registering on our gaydar and neither of us were able to pull that move off.

Hey, good for you!! As a guy, fun to learn about and respond to female sexuality issues. As for a two-male threesome. I did it once, long ago, as the second guy with a married couple. Didn't work out well because I was only there as an auxiliary, not as a partner. The lesson is that both guys need to feel like they're in this together and the girl needs to bestow her favors more or less equally. But it's a male fantasy also. I occasionally watch porn videos with threesomes, and it's clear that the girl can get off like crazy if everybody's working together; and if the girl is getting off, the guys (at least this one) will be thrilled as well. The lady who wrote in raises another good point, though: how can she arrange it. Simplest is if her guy of the moment knows a friend to bring along. But if she's connecting with some new guy at a party, it will be tough because both candidate guys will feel jealous and threatened. Better is if she has a way to "advertise" for the guys, so that they know in advance what the deal is going to be.

I have been with a woman and another man and it has been one of the highlights of my sexual experiences. The man was a good friend of mine and the woman was a friend of his. There wasn't any direct sexual interaction between us two guys, but we sure did enjoy ourselves in trying to please our female friend. I don't know what would have happened if she requested that we get it on with each other.

A MFM 3way is one of the hottest things that I have ever been a part of. It started with me desire to be a voyeur. I put an ad in a paper and a couple contacted me. We met for lunch and got along well. They called me that night and invited me over for dinner. After a nice dinner and conversation we moved on to dessert! They began kissing and undressing in front of me and then invited me into the bedroom with them at which point we all stripped and I sat down next to them on them on the bed watching as he went down on her. She asked me if I wanted a taste so then he watched as I went down on her. We then took turns pleasing her. It was all about her. She wanted to suck one cock and fuck another and then switch.

Then she asked to have them both in her at once. I am still amazed how she was able to accomplish that. In any case that was the first time and I have done it a few times since then.. why only a few? You might think it is because it has hard to find guys willing to be naked with another man out of fear of being labeled gay. Actually I have found tons of guys who would love to do a MFM threesome but finding the women is not so easy. The guys I have met for the most part have also been interested in exploring with the other guy if the girl asked them to and if she found it hot to watch.

Tom
NY

I've been involved in MFM threesomes (aka CAKE Sam'ich)and would definately do it again. The feeling of being part of a woman's fantasy is unbelievable! As a straight man, I've never felt uncomfortable. The situations I've been in have all been centered around pleasuring the woman, and have been some of the best sexual experiences I've ever had. I've never experienced any resentment or competition with the other males involved, but maybe I've just been lucky. Ladies, please don't be afraid to tell your partner what you want, because there are nice guys out there that would love to help your fantasies come true!

You ask have you? would you? will you?... and I say yes yes yes.. It happened several years ago, I had my own accounting service and went to review the books and records of a potential new client The appointment was at her home/office. Upon entering I noticed a college age guy playing solotaire in her den. After the review she invited me to have a glass of wine with her and her friend. One glass followed others and before long we were all feeling quite good. Her friend obviously was her lover as she started fondling him in front of me. But not wanting me to feel left out, she had me sit on the other side of her and alternated in giving me passionate kisses after kissing him. Before long clothing was discarded and her kissing him extended to his very hard cock. Yet she still came back to kiss me, drawing me closer to where she was kissing and sucking on him. Till my face was as close to his throbing dick as her mouth was. First kissing his hardness then my lips and back again.. rubbing his cock against my cheek as she kissed him and me at the same time till his cock head was against my lips while she was licking us both.. opening my mouth with her tongue and pushing his cock inside along with her tongue.. and that was only the begining of the night. Before the evening was over we were both inside her at the same time.. with she as the director of every action.. It may have been the most sensual encounter of my life...

I have not, although if the opportunity presented itself... maybe. Cake is dead on that the big/good enough question comes in to play, especially if it's a woman you're emotionally involved with. If you don't naturally have the fantasy of watching her with another man, you'd have to be some sort of freaky robot to not feel at least a little insecure. However, in the 'drunken hook-up' scenario, i wouldn't think that would come in to play. If everyone is having a good time and you don't plan on seeing each other again, who cares how she feels about the other guy involved. That's when it gets hot, and that's when I'd be most likely to have a Cake Sam'ich

Anonymous

Actually, maybe I'm weird, but I have always found 2 men on a woman more fascinating visually than 2 women on a man. (And I am a man). I do *not* fantasize about being with two women (though I've been there) but certainly *do* about being in a duo taking advantage (or being taken advantage of?) a woman that I do/do not know. It exhibits much more of a, hmmm, raw sexuality on the part of the woman -- and that, besides the taboo of sexually touching a man, is what really turns me on...

Reading the breakdown of the set of male "concerns" around the CAKE sam'ich was way to eerie. My girlfriend has asked for us to try this - and at first my head basically played those responses - hey this is my girlfirend, I don't want to share, what if he is "better" than me? cuter? etc. And I am kind of repulsed and interested in the homosexual aspects at the same time. But we have a great relationship - and after a bit I gulped and said that in the right circumstance, I would oblige. We have the same agreement for the opposite variety. Part of our "rule" is that this could only happen on strange turf, metaphorically and physically - with someone we don't know somewhere we don't live. Like on vacation. I really want to see how happy it can make my girlfriend, so I will just swallow my fears so to speak- -and try not to touch anything but feet with the other guy. But I am still a bit scared of the mental image in mind.

Anonymous

One boy, two girls ... yes, a few times. But two boys, one girl, well, this is a first. After a few long minutes considering, the answer is YES, I WOULD DO IT. Feet will touch, yes, but I guess I can live with that. As in any other combination of relationship, the MMF combo involves respect, a lot of it. I am straight, and very confident that I will remain so even with another man "in the show". And if I am comfortable enough that the other guy (whatever tendencies he may have) will respect me and my desire not to "be with him" (the same way any decent sex partner has to respect the other), then I am sure there will not be a problem. It all goes back to the trust and respect factor.