"I want to know other women's experiences with clitoral vs. G-spot orgasms. I have been exploring G-spot orgasms with great success and have always had remarkable clitoral orgasms. I have found that G-spot orgasms are more textured, deeper and more mature, although I also love my short, but sweet clitoral orgasms as part of my orgasm regime. I am wondering if other CAKE members have had similar experiences." - From a member of The Pleasure Club.
Ah, the illusive female orgasm - so much mystery! Or so it would seem if you read all of the supposed guidebooks and how-to mumbo jumbo on the market. Judging from all of that "expert advice," you would think that no one knows for sure what is going on "down there." Well, CAKE is here to say that we are so very tired of all this mystery - us women are the experts when it comes to the female body and female pleasure. As our friend Rebecca Chalker puts it - we want the "clitoral truth" demystified once and for all!
Unlike men, women can experience orgasm several different ways, via clitoral, vaginal and G-spot stimulation, or a combination of both. Hopefully, you may already orgasm fairly easily with direct clitoral stimulation using hands (yours or a partner’s), or vibrators. As the CAKE member notes above, women are successfully exploring our bodies and orgasmic potential with much gusto. However, many members report an extended search for the holy grail of female sexual pleasure - the G-spot orgasm. With questions of where it is, how to stimulate it, what it does, and how it relates to the clitoris, we understand why this treasure box remains buried for many women.
The three most important points of exploration on our pleasure hunt are: one - the clitoris, to the two - the G-spot, to the three - the female ejaculation. The key to the treasure box is the relation between the three, which varies from woman to woman.
The Clitoris: Where it all begins. The familiar nub known as the clitoris is actually only the exposed part of erectile tissue that winds much deeper into a woman’s body. The external clitoris favors consistent, stroking, licking, sucking and vibrating to build up to an orgasm. Favorite sex toys include boyfriend’s tongue and/or thumb, the Hitachi Magic Wand, the Pocket Rocket, and the Strawberry.
The G-Spot: Where it takes considerably more shape. The G-spot is a small bundle of tissue and nerves about two inches into the vagina on the upper wall. The G-spot is known as the female prostrate - when stimulated capable of producing female ejaculation. The size and location of the G-Spot will vary from woman to woman, but it's usually about the size of a quarter, and lies two to three inches inside the vagina directly behind the pubic bone.
Go find your G-spot - now, yes, now!
To explore this area, lie down with your knees bent and feet flat on the bed, with your pelvis tilted slightly. Insert the length of your fingers into your vagina towards your navel. This will be about two inches inside the vagina. Press with one or two fingers against the front wall of your vagina. Apply a "come hither" motion with your fingers. When you stimulate the right spot, it will swell. Slide your fingers from side to side. When you find the sensitive spot, continue stimulating it and you may find that it becomes firm.
Move your fingers in even circles all around the vagina, with your fingers as far "in" as is comfortable. It generally feels best if you keep consistent, firm pressure along the entire length of the fingers against the vaginal walls and if you keep the pressure fairly constant while rotating though you can give a little extra pressure at 12 o'clock.
Stop rotating and rest your fingertips on the (often slightly ridged) area of the vagina just behind the pubic bone and exert pressure upwards, towards your belly. This is direct G-spot stimulation, and it usually feels best if the fingers are subtly moving somehow. You can move them in small, slow circles, or point the fingers more sharply upwards and rock them forwards and back.
Suggested position with a male partner to get at the G-spot optimally - we call it inverted, but you can refer to it as the "upside down CAKE." Male partner lies on his back while female partner lays inverted (head at his feet) on her side next to him with her leg resting across his chest. This allows easy access and optimal hand positioning direct to your G-spot while of course you can amuse yourself by stroking and stoking his penis. Favorite toys - partner's pointer and middle fingers, and the Rabbit.
IMPORTANT - if you have tried this before with limited results: You should not necessarily be looking for an immediately pleasurable sensation. If you are not turned on before you begin your search - your G-spot area may not feel much different when you press on it than other areas inside your CAKE - or you might actually feel a bit like you have to pee. We highly recommend added clitoral stimulation to your search. Or, you can play out your usual solo routine first, as orgasms will help the area to swell up and become more sensitive.
Female Ejaculation: Where it all comes together. Known since classical times through the writings of Aristotle female ejaculation became identified with the G-Spot through the work of Dr. Graffenberg, for whom the G-Spot is named. When stimulated, it swells with blood and emits ejaculate fluid, sometimes during orgasm, sometimes not.
Continuous stimulation of the urethral sponge can cause the paraurethral glands to fill up with a clear, odorless fluid that is sometimes expelled from the body through the urethra. In recent years, female ejaculate has been chemically analyzed and determined to be distinct from urine in its composition. This ejaculation can accompany orgasm or simply be part of arousal. Ejaculation and orgasm are two distinct physiological phenomena in both women and men.
If you've never experienced ejaculation and would like to, try incorporating G-spot stimulation into your usual masturbation techniques. Have you ever felt like you have to pee - while your G-spot area is being stimulated? That's a sign - so go with it! If you have emptied your bladder before beginning to play, you are most likely on the road to ejaculation. You may need to bear down, or you may just need to let go - and allow it to happen. Generally - the more turned on you are, the better, so pop in a video, get your collection of toys our and conjure up your greatest fantasy.
Women's experiences of ejaculation can range from simply feeling more wet than usual to shooting jets of fluid. Female ejaculation is now acknowledged as a genuine sexual response, but the fact that not every woman has experienced it should not be thought of as an inadequacy. The goal should be to reach you own sexual potential to experience pleasure. Female ejaculation currently occurs in 20% of all women, although the phenomenon is fairly misunderstood by both men and women, alike. However, Deborah Sundahl author of "Female Ejaculation and the G-spot" insists in her book that all women have the physiological capacity to ejaculate due to the intertwining nature of the clitoris and G-spot. Favorite video - "How to Female Ejaculate."
A word on multiple orgasms: Most women who have experienced both types of orgasms claim that it is easier to have multiple G-spot orgasms than it is to have multiple clitoral orgasms. There is often a "pyramid effect" with multiple G-spot orgasms; each one makes the next one feel better, and makes almost anything else sexual feel better too.
The map is one thing - but the journey is another. The body basics are there, but in the end every woman must find our own box of pleasure. CAKE believes that all women are the experts and the most important information we can learn is what we learn from each other. Now we ask you - the members of CAKE - to tell us exactly how your orgasm works. The secrets of your body may be just what another woman needs to hear to unlock the secrets of hers own.
No more mystery - just pure good loving fun brought to you by CAKE!
Love,
CAKE
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The Pleasure Club Topic of the Week: In great detail - break down your pleasure for other members using the three basic points on the map: the clitoris, the g-spot and ejaculation. Detail your orgasmic journey so that other women may find their way on their own. SUBMIT AT THE PLEASURE CLUB NOW! Missing out on all of the fun of The Pleasure Club yet? |
Interested in receiving UK specific CAKE Bytes? Sign up here now. Finding out about female ejaculation in the UK is tough enough, but at least we have the internet (and CAKE). Should you decide that this phenomenon has to be seen to be believed, you may be pretty upset to hear that the BBFC (British Board of Film Classification) flatly refuse to consider any films for R18 rating that show female ejaculation. As far as they are concerned, it doesn’t exist, so any women doing it on film are urinating, end of discussion. When a UK documentary was made to try and shed some light on the topic, they banned that too. What: |
