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I am sexy, pretty, intelligent and liberated Latin woman. I've always done what I wanted sexually. I know how to make the first step with a man. I can do it easily. I am really elegant and discrete. Unfortunately, I have never been able to find two men to go to bed with at the same time. Yes, I have always fantasized to have a threesome with two men but it has never happened. Since I was a little girl, all those delicious moments of sex and desire were related to men. I have never desired women in my life. Anyway, it's very difficult, mission impossible, to find two straight men to go to bed with one woman. My thesis is this: most men think that if they are with the same woman at the same time then maybe they have to desire each other too. So, I keep trying without any luck. I was very close twice. Two guys and me were kissing and touching in the same room, at a party, but both of them made clear that they would not take it to the "threesome" level. Maybe, one day...
- Signed an anonymous CAKE member

This is certainly not the first, nor the last, time we have heard from women expressing the desire to be with more than one man at the same time. Contrary to the "ultimate male fantasy" of a classic ménage a trois, the female desire of being smack dab in the middle of a man sandwich - or what we like to call "The CAKE Sam'ich" - is a clear indication that women are interested in being the center of our very own sexual evolutions. Furthermore, women are breaking down the long held myths that we do not want to see two men together with us in our beds and that we are not interested in getting more bang for our buck.

From much of the feedback we have received here at CAKE about the better known threesome - the woman to woman interaction is about flipping the switch on the same old, same old of female heterosexual competition, to good old fashioned DESIRE. One woman desiring another woman for the sake of sexual pleasure can be a major turn on for the women involved - and of course the man who is witnessing the fantastical movie he has been playing in his mind since puberty come to life.

But does flipping the switch on the old sam'ich have the same connotations for the woman involved? Are we women interested in being at the center of our own self-directed movie with two men in the supporting roles? Well, sure! Right? And what about for the two men involved? How do they experience this newfound configuration? Talk about taboo! At the heart of the matter, we see that this is yet another double standard when it comes to female sexuality. While the traditionally known type of threesome is acceptable, encouraged, and by our estimations - widely practiced - the other female directed one just seems to sit around gathering cultural dust!

The very notion of a woman desiring not one, but two men at her disposal, implies a strong desire for control and pleasure. It makes perfect sense really - an indication of sexual equality and choice, as women explore new horizons of possibility. Who can't get with the program of - "Come hither boys and cater to my every whim." What fun! Now if we could only convince the men that it does not emasculate you, but on the contrary, it increases your own sexual repertoire.

Alas, every woman knows the leaps and bounds most men would have to take to give it up to us with another man involved. On one simple level, this may have something to do with a cultural need for all men to be in control of the sexual dynamics of their interpersonal interactions. It would seem nearly impossible to find two men who could jointly share control of pleasuring their female companion, without constantly competing in the sack. On the other hand...that might not be such a bad thing!

Digging deeper, many men are inherently threatened by the notion that their partners may desire sexual interaction with another man, in any context. This is tied to an imbedded and widespread sexual insecurity that we all share. Are we not enough? Not big enough? Tight enough? Pretty enough? Manly enough? Good enough? As a whole, we are territorial creatures. We have also been culturally led to believe that monogamy is the natural state of affairs. In the end, that may be true for some and is part of a much broader discussion. However, it is clear that it is inherently difficult to grasp the notion of "sharing" one's partner, even if it is their ultimate desire and represents the possibility of unprecedented pleasure.

Well - if all that‚s not enough to get over, quite possibly there is also the stigma attached to a potential homosexual tendency. Culturally speaking, if two men are in bed together, in any context - they MUST be "gay," right? That's ridiculous! We don't assume that two women together in a threesome with a man are inherently gay, do we? But, if you are going to get down with a second man in the mix - they are most definitely going to have to be comfortable with their feet touching...at the very least. We find it hard to believe that the MMF configuration could be properly implemented without the slightest bit of MM contact. That's going to be a real challenge for some men. And, a possibly serious disappointment for the woman.

That said, we have faith that men will eventually come around to the notion of the woman being in control and acting out her fantasy of watching, wanting, touching, feeling two men by her side in bed. Anyone out there ready to rise to the challenge?

Because this is a new topic for CAKE to tackle, we want to hear from the men this time on your thoughts, insecurities, and desires to act out the CAKE Sam'ich for your girl - if of course that is want she wants. You see, it is quite simple really - along with changing roles for women come changing roles for guys. CAKE supports a greater communication between men and women about what we all want, which means that the male voice has a big role in this "revolution." Sometimes the problem is that women and men remain on separate planets because no one is bringing the two perspectives together.

You've asked for it and now you get it - CAKE is launching a permanent place on the CAKE website for all you guys out there to respond to the illuminating, and sometimes, we know, confusing world of female sexuality. So get to it, we want to know your thoughts on the "CAKE Sam'ich" and whether you'd be down for this common CAKE Girl fantasy. Let us girls know what YOU are thinking - your hopes, your fears, your hidden desires, and we will be sure to tell you what we want.